.139 Jacob Tobia

It was just like any other subway commute home in New York City, only this time, there was Jacob was sitting right in front of me. Barely an hour earlier, I had seen them featured on Instagram’s own account looking fierce, smart, and fabulous and here they were now, still looking fierce, smart, and fabulous. I mustered up some courage, said hello, and thus began a friendship that has continually brought me so much joy, inspiration, surprise, laughter, learning, and growth.

One of the first things I noticed about Jacob was their insatiable curiosity and desire to learn. Jacob so clearly spends their time working tirelessly to grow and better themself so that tomorrow can bring the next exciting challenge and opportunity. When I’m around Jacob or just talking to them, this diligence and ambition they have is like throwing back a shot of inspiration with encouragement as the chaser. They match this drive with a deep, genuine force of empathy that gives them the superpower of connecting with anyone and everyone around them, which of course must be one of many reasons why their mind is full of such impactful ideas, stories and narratives.

Another piece of the Jacob kaleidoscope is their remarkable ability to advocate for themself. They have a healthy and gentle love for themself which gorgeously shines through, in turn inviting those in the conversation to build upon that love for themselves. This, of course, is complemented by Jacob’s passion and love for the entire queer community which they beautifully amplify whenever and however they can. Jacob is a wonderful beacon of compassion and anyone who comes into contact with them cannot leave unmarked by their kindness and generosity. Put simply, I (and I know others) feel lucky that we have Jacob on this wild planet and it’s a genuine joy to watch and support their brain, heart and impact.

Jacob, thank you so very much for being such an open-minded and kindhearted human being. Thank you for always making me cackle with your wit, your incredible sense of humor, and for inspiring me with your eloquent thoughts and ideas around just about everything. Thank you for listening to my ideas and stories and for being so present in every conversation we have. Thank you for the unconditional care and love that you give your friends and your family, and thank you for your openness and wonderful energy on that subway the day we met! Thank you, Jacob, for being you.

-BD